What Have I Done?
by ObdurateSinner
Summary: Modern AU where Mikasa insists on being Eren's prom date. Is it because she is being her usual over-protective self or does she have ulterior motives? Warning! Graphic content.


**A/N: So, the story of my life is that I only started reading fanfics recently (let's not admit how recently because that's just a sad situation) and have become addicted to them! I've read dozens, probably well over a hundred by now in this mysterious short time, and wondered if I could possibly do it too. And do it I did! After a bit of 'just getting on with it', I finally wrote my VERY FIRST FANFIC (YAY)! Please take this into consideration when reading and be gentle with the reviews (I'm a sensitive soul) but any feedback and criticism will be appreciated. Let's make this the first of many, shall we? Sooo enjoy and I hope you like!**

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><p>It had already been decided months ago that Mikasa would be Eren's date to Trost High's prom. She had unanimously made the decision that no one else was good enough for her adoptive brother, because the over-protective, possessive teenage girl couldn't stand the thought of someone else's presence gracing Eren's at the event that would be the highlight of their high school career. Not even Eren's own boyfriend, Mikasa's cousin, would be acceptable as a date for the teenage heartthrob.<p>

At first, Eren was opposed to the idea, but as time went on, he slowly learnt to accept it. It couldn't be that bad, he thought, since him and Mikasa had grown up together: with her, at least he was guaranteed to stay off the dance floor. The highly uncoordinated teen hated nothing more than dancing, and any other date may insist he dance with them. So when he eventually agreed with Mikasa, he left her the honor of telling his boyfriend, since it was her grand idea, after all.

The way in which it had happened could've been better, but that would be expecting miracles from both stubborn Ackermans. The memory was fresh in Eren's mind.

_Eren had awoken one Saturday to an absolute commotion in the quaint three-bedroom apartment that he lived in with his adoptive sister and their mother, Carla. It wasn't a big place, having three bedrooms and one bathroom to share between the two, a small living area and an open-plan kitchen attached to it. But it was all they could afford since Grisha – Eren refused to call him dad – left them when the kids were only ten.  
><em>

"_He is _my_ boyfriend, Mikasa, I have the right to go with him!" a deep, familiar voice growled menacingly._

_The brunette sat up in his bed and sighed. When Levi and Mikasa started fighting, it was sure to have a horrific ending. They would yell threats and insults and use language that would make a sailor shy, and it wasn't uncommon for their squabbles to become physical fights. He had to interject before they broke the house down._

"_Well, he is my _brother_ and I know what's best for him!" Mikasa spat back, her voice low and laced with acid. "And it's definitely not you!"_

_Levi laughed humourlessly. "You're a year too late to be spitting that bullshit, _cousin_."_

_By now, Eren had dressed and was leaving his room. The two Ackerman cousins had never gotten along despite Levi being Mikasa's last blood relative, and their relationship somehow worsened after Eren and Levi had started dating. Mikasa despised the fact that her uncompassionate, short-tempered cousin had gotten her warm and loving brother to fall in love with him._

_She had sworn to castrate the midget, as she referred to him, the first chance she got._

"_I swear to god, Levi, I am going to~"_

"_Good morning!" Eren called out, cutting off whatever horrendous threat Mikasa was about to spew._

_The two ravens spun around to Eren, and he was met with two sets of grey eyes, one steely with annoyance and the other softening at the sight of the scruffy brunette standing in the living room, smiling awkwardly._

"_Good morning, Eren," she breathed._

_Eren smiled a little wider, but his oceanic eyes were cautious beneath his thick brows. He turned his gaze to his boyfriend then, who had now turned away to look at something seemingly very interesting on the kitchen floor._

_Cautiously, Eren sauntered over to the raven-haired male and gently placed his hands on the man's hips. At half a head shorter than the brunette, the raven begrudgingly looked up to meet the teen's expectant gaze with his own annoyed eyes._

"_Good morning, babe," Eren whispered._

"_Tch," was the response, before Levi immediately dropped his gaze._

"_Point proven," Mikasa mumbled, but both males heard her._

_Levi tensed and was about to retort when Eren's fingers clamped down hard on the shorter man's hips, cautioning him to hold his tongue. With a snarl, Levi heeded Eren's warning and instead of spitting back at his cousin, he pulled out of Eren's hold and made his way to the front door._

"_I don't have time for this bullshit teenage drama," Levi growled, opening the door. He turned back to Eren and said, "Call me when you're ready then I'll come pick you up."_

_And with that, he shut the front door more harshly than necessary, leaving Eren and Mikasa standing in the kitchen in silence. Silence that was short-lived._

"_What the hell, Mikasa?" Eren cried out, hands in the air in exasperation._

"_What?" Mikasa asked softly. She did not want to fight with her brother. She loved him too much. "I just told him that I'll be your prom date."_

_Eren rolled his eyes. He knew what Mikasa had said, but what concerned him was the way she might have said it. He had no doubt that there was a jeering insult in the way she had broken the news to her cousin._

_The brunette simply raised his hands to his ears and shook his head, his mood ruined, and made his way back to his bedroom. The two ravens were always fighting – it was an endless cycle of threats, insults and physical violence and Eren could not tolerate it any longer. He once tried to mend their relationship but gave up on that, and had resorted to keeping the two apart. But it was his one-year anniversary today, and Levi had come to pick him up for their outing Levi had planned for the day._

_Trust Mikasa to ruin the wonderful day by dropping the bomb._

He knew that she was only looking out for him and protecting him against the hundreds of judgemental homophobes that attended Trost High. That was why Eren had agreed to go with her in the first place, because he knew that taking a man as his date would simply be courting disaster. The brunette may not be afraid of a fight, but that didn't mean he went around looking for them. It was a sweet gesture, but Eren would _never_ admit that out loud.

But in the end, even if he wanted to take Levi to prom, he couldn't. The raven had pitched up at his doorstep unannounced just a week earlier and simply said they could no longer see each other.

_I can't do this, _Eren remembered the raven saying before simply walking away. No explanation, no apology. One sentence and the raven had left.

The shell-shocked Eren could only stare in awe as his lover, his very first lover, walked out of his life. The sentence had paralyzed him to the point where he couldn't even say a single word, let alone chase after the man he loved, and in the end, he simply watched the best thing that had ever happened to him leave his life.

Eren sighed and shut his eyes tightly, fighting back the tears that were threatening to spill over. For the past seven days, he had cried himself to sleep every night, and often broke down at random times during the day as the smallest things reminded him of Levi – a song, a quote, a simple location he drove by every day. He couldn't get the raven out of his mind, and every time he tried to phone the man, he was greeted with Levi's voicemail.

"Leave a number and I might call back."

The monotone was all Eren had left, and he found himself phoning the number dozens of times every day, sometimes to leave desperate messages, and sometimes just to hear that voice that he loved.

To be frank, Eren was sick of his incessant crying. He hated how weak Levi had made him, reducing the popular high school boy to an emotional wreck with just four words. The more Eren cried, the angrier he got, and the angrier he got, the more he cried. It was impossible to reign in his emotions and he absolutely hated it. The last seven days had been hell for the teenager and he was at his limit now; trying to appear normal in front of everyone had been excruciating when he knew his life was anything but normal, in fact it was falling to pieces.

Needless to say, Mikasa's desire to castrate the midget had grown exponentially.

"Get a grip, man," Eren said to himself.

Wiping away the stray tears, Eren breathed in and out deeply several times to regain his composure. This was prom. It was a night to enjoy, not a night to mope about the short asshole that tore his heart out for no reason whatsoever. Tonight was about no one else but him, and he was going to make the most of it. He couldn't allow Levi to have that sort of hold over him.

Once he was confident that he wouldn't burst out into tears again, he gave himself a once over. He looked pretty damn good, if he could say so himself. Puberty had been good to the boy, and the eighteen year old ended up filling his lanky frame quite nicely, giving him a tall and broad figure generously coated with lean muscles chiseled from years of sport. And the way the black tuxedo hugged his frame enunciated his physical qualities, elongating his legs and broadening his shoulders, yet still leaving much to the imagination. Even his usually entropic mop of chocolate brown hair had been tamed…mostly.

Eren was satisfied. He never knew he could look this good in a tuxedo. After he'd seen Levi in a tux, Eren was convinced that no male on the planet could look as good. He remembered how every time Levi wore his tailored tuxedos, Eren wouldn't be able to keep his hands off the raven, teasing him and then stripping him of the clothes so he could claim the man as his own.

_No, Eren_, he thought, shaking his head. He didn't want to think of that man. Not tonight. Not ever.

He knocked on Mikasa's bedroom door. "Mikasa, how far are you?"

"Just about…ow! Done!" she called out before cussing loudly. A loud banging and the sound of something heavy falling came from behind the door, Eren didn't want to know what. After the ensuing cussing, Eren swallowed hard.

"I'll, uh, be in the kitchen," he said, stepping away from the female's domain with the caution of a person backing away from someone who was armed.

As he waited in the kitchen for Mikasa, he stared at the floor dejectedly. Just over a week ago, Levi had taken him right here on the kitchen floor after the two had powered through a good five miles in the blistering afternoon sun. It was an urgent and passionate lust-filled romp fueled by carnal need. It was sexy and wild and…

Eren stopped himself right there. A pang of anguish exploded in his chest, the emptiness knocking the wind out of his lungs. Clutching his chest, Eren pinched his eyes shut and willed the image away as he realized that that was the last time he'd had Levi's body to himself. The clicking of heels immediately brought Eren out of his despairing thoughts and his head snapped up to see what Mikasa looked like. He had been curious for weeks, unable to imagine his athletic friend in anything remotely feminine, never mind a formal dress and heels.

But he took that back when his eyes flew as wide as dinner plates at the exquisite sight before him.

Mikasa wore a plain black dress that hugged her athletic figure entrancingly, carving out curves in her full body that Eren had never imagined the girl had. Her left shoulder was exposed and the dress dropped low on her chest, exposing her plump cleavage – that, once again, Eren had no idea the girl had. And the thigh high slit in her dress revealed a long, slender leg, the muscles on it well-defined and mouth-watering.

Eren stared like an idiot. Mikasa looked gorgeous. He refused to believe he'd been living with this girl for nearly a decade.

"Do I look okay?" Mikasa asked, lifting her head.

When her eyes met with Eren's the boy's breath hitched. Her face was flawless, a light blush dusting her cheeks and her plump little lips, devil red, parted slightly as they usually were. Her eyes, though they had an uncertainty in those endless grey depths, were made to be seductive with the dark make-up encasing them.

Eren could feel his heart beat faster as he stared at the perfect beauty before him.

"You…" Eren started, but nothing more would come out. He breathed shakily and tried again. "Wow."

Mikasa's blush deepened and she lowered her head again, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear before Eren's hand on her chin made her look up and straight into his wild, oceanic eyes.

"I think I have the most beautiful girl in school as my date," Eren breathed.

Mikasa's breath caught. Oh how many times had she dreamed, fantasized about Eren saying those sorts of things to her? It had been years since she'd stopped seeing Eren as her brother and more as something else, and for years her feelings were left unreturned. And here he was, breath-taking in the tuxedo, touching her like a lover would, saying things only a lover would.

If she were to die now, she would die happy, she thought dryly as they made their way to prom.

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><p>Hours went by as the prom went on, with teenagers dancing and chatting and making out in dark places just like teenagers were supposed to do. Eren couldn't help but smirk when he saw his best friend sneaking off with his date, inevitably to get a little bit of action. He caught the blonde's eyes and winked at the shorter teen, encouraging him. With a blush, Armin and his date disappeared into the night.<p>

Almost all his friends had dates, which made the entire dynamic of the evening easier. The only problem was that Bertolt, a tall and gentle giant, had been stood up. His date was not from this school, and the girl's home was abandoned when the dark-haired teen had gone to pick her up. Fortunately, Reiner was there to keep the lone Bertolt company since he had opted to go dateless – so he said, but the truth was that the girl he wanted to go with had rejected him in favor of her own girlfriend.

No one spoke of it lest they destroy the brawny blonde's ego.

With the girls taking a lengthy tour to the bathroom, the boys had gathered in a quieter corner, chatting amongst themselves. They all looked good in their formal wear, except for Connie, who managed to make even a tuxedo look untidy. Perhaps it was his buzz-cut and wild, wide eyes that made him look like a juvenile delinquent, but no matter what the short teen wore, he never looked neat.

Jean had taken the welcomed break from his date to hold his boyfriend's hand. Marco's freckled face blushed as fingers intertwined with his, and the blush deepened as Jean whispered into his ear, saying 'that blush really compliments your dark hair'. Eren wanted to throw up all over the happy couple. He had seen too many displays of public affection, and in his current state he was sure to go insane.

Where were the girls? He wanted to get the hell away from this disgusting display of love and affection.

"Guys, I got some booze for the after-party," Jean whispered as softly as he could over the blaring music.

The after-party was to be held at Jean's house, since his parents were out of town. Of course, Eren had no interest in liquor, being underage and all. He may not have been a saint, but the teen had no desire to blatantly break rules. He believed they were put in place for a reason. Besides, getting drunk with his horse-face adversary could only lead to disaster.

"Sweet!" Connie cried out. "You got any here?"

"I have two bottles in the car," Jean replied.

Eren rolled his eyes. These idiots were seriously not considering drinking in a place where there were teachers and possibly cops lurking around. He looked over in the direction of the bathrooms and saw that the girls were still missing. He couldn't understand his sudden obsession with Mikasa, but he had to admit that the girl was absolutely breath-taking in that black dress and those six-inch heels that brought her to his eye level.

"Let's have some now," Connie suggested. "This party is boooring!"

Maybe it was because the more he thought about Mikasa, the less his mind wandered to his ex-boyfriend? The more Eren fixated on the girl, the more Levi felt like a dream, like a fuzzy memory that would be easily forgotten. Whenever he looked at her beautiful face or her perfect body, all the pain and loneliness disappeared. He knew it wasn't right, but he couldn't deny that it made him feel better. Briefly, anyway.

"Sure!" Jean cried out, tugging on Marco's hand.

"I'm game," Reiner announced, and Bertolt followed suit. Reiner laughed then and said, "Yeah shame, let's get this poor guy's mind off that girl that ditched him."

Bertolt blushed and followed Jean and Marco, leaving Reiner behind. Reiner, Connie and Eren were quick to follow suit, all but forgetting their dates.

_It'll be quick anyway_, Eren thought to himself, promising to rush back to Mikasa as soon as he was done with the guys.

Once they were outside, Jean turned to Eren and asked, "Is your boyfriend coming to the after-party?"

Eren froze. It had been seven days and none of his friends knew that he'd been dumped. Was it because he was embarrassed that he'd gotten dumped? Or was it because he was so preoccupied with controlling his tears trying to move on with his life that he simply hadn't had the chance to break the news to his friends? Come to think of it, did Armin even know?

"There is no boyfriend," Eren mumbled, dropping his head and continuing to walk.

Jean's eyes snapped to Eren. "No boyfriend?"

"Ah!" Connie called out, wolf-whistling. "No boyfriend, huh? I saw how you've been checking Mikasa out, you playboy, you!"

Eren rolled his eyes. Of course Connie wouldn't understand what he'd meant. But Connie was right; Eren had been checking Mikasa out…since before they left their home. He couldn't get the thought of the raven-haired girl out of his mind, and he was sick of trying – he knew he wanted her for all the wrong reasons, but he was just happy that his mind wasn't on Levi, just for once.

"What happened?" Marco asked softly.

Eren simply shook his head. The last thing he wanted to talk about now was that short prick that had brutally ripped his heart to shreds without so much as a reason or even glancing back, the undersized asshole that he loved so much and couldn't get off his mind. Until tonight. Until he saw Mikasa. And he didn't want to change that. But he still couldn't deny that he was hurting inside.

Maybe the liquor wasn't such a bad idea after all.

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><p>When and how he'd come to be on a golf course, Eren had no idea. But here he was, his intoxicated body buzzing with a feverish warmth that ignited the deepest and purest happiness within him, stumbling along the damp fairway with his dress shirt unbuttoned and his jacket nowhere in sight. But he didn't care where the stupid jacket or the bowtie was. He was feeling euphoric in this moment in time, the crisp evening air stinging his lungs as he stumbled along, his fingers intertwined with someone else's. Someone else's?<p>

Then he heard it. He turned to see Mikasa was running behind him, giggling like a little school girl as she stumbled behind Eren, her heels in one hand and Eren's hand in the other.

Mikasa? Giggling?

His turn went unnoticed by the usually agile girl, and she crashed straight into Eren's hard body, sending the boy toppling backwards onto the soft grass with his best friend atop him, still giggling. A light blush adorned her cheeks, much like the one he'd seen in the kitchen, and Eren wondered why Mikasa would seem so flushed after such a short run. Even he wasn't out of breath. But then Eren remembered that the girls had joined the boys in drinking by Jean's car.

Mikasa was drunk. Eren was drunk too.

It was obvious by the way the proximity of their bodies in the dark sent thousands of bolts of electricity running through the veins of both teenagers as lust overcame their senses. Eren scooted back to sit up, and Mikasa perched herself between his open legs, her wanting grey eyes fixed on his oceanic orbs. The whole world ceased to exist as the two intoxicated teens stared at each other for an immeasurable amount of time, bodies tingling and hearts fluttering as their basic instincts began to surface.

_When did I start feeling like this?_ Eren thought, as he watched Mikasa move closer to him.

Her eyes were focused on his, but his eyes had dipped to her plump red lips. They were parted slightly, and the smell of alcohol came from them as she breathed over his skin, closing the distance between them until her lips were just a breath away from Eren's. Eren stopped breathing in anticipation, his heart beating wildly in his chest as the desire to feel Mikasa's lips on his stopped all other thoughts in the boy's mind. He could only think one thing.

_I want her._

Eren moaned and finally closed the distance between them, claiming Mikasa's lips in a surprisingly gentle kiss. Mikasa's eyes closed as a tingle ran down her spine at the feel of Eren's warm, oddly soft lips on hers. They reveled in the feeling of each other, skin on skin for the first time, Mikasa's fantasy finally playing out and Eren's lusting finally taking control.

But it wasn't enough for the boy. He wanted more, he wanted all of her. His tongue snaked out of his mouth and ran along her bottom lip, silently seeking permission to enter, which was quickly granted as Mikasa opened her mouth with a stifled gasp.

Immediately Eren jumped at the opportunity, grabbing her neck and pulling her into the kiss, his tongue invading her mouth hotly as he deepened the kiss. His wet appendage was sloppy and his drunken movements uncoordinated as he explored the unfamiliar cavity, searching every crevice thoroughly until he found Mikasa's small tongue perched in her mouth.

Eren's minty scent consumed the raven as she moved her tongue, unsure of what to do, following Eren's lead obediently. The feeling of his hot tongue playing with hers was intoxicating, and her entire body was on fire as the boy sloppily kissed her, holding her body to his with a strength she never knew he possessed. Intoxicated and feeling more and more so as the seconds became minutes, Mikasa's will crumbled in Eren's hands as the boy had his way with her, his experienced mouth claiming hers.

He loved it. He loved how she felt and how she tasted, the strong and frightening Mikasa Ackerman being submissive and letting Eren take complete control. It drove the boy crazy as he kissed her, reveling in the fact that there was no fight for dominance and that Mikasa was his to do with what he pleased. She did what he wanted without fighting back, so unlike Levi.

_Don't think about him!_

Eren pinched his eyes shut and whimpered as a pang of pain resonated in his chest. The emptiness he was trying so hard to fill didn't want to be filled: even in this intimate moment, Levi still made his way into the brunette's thoughts.

_Fuck…_

Mikasa grabbed Eren by the shoulders and held him close as she heard the boy whimper. She had no idea why he would sound so pained at a time like this, but the raven's instincts to protect Eren were strong, and she held his warm body close to hers. With her strong arms enveloping him, Eren relaxed some and shifted the raven's legs to lock around his waist, all the while keeping his lips locked onto hers.

Pulling away just a bit, Eren smiled and playfully nipped at Mikasa's bottom lip, causing the girl to gasp. Her breast jutted against Eren as her entire body responded to the feeling of teeth on her lips, and the boy liked this. He bit again, softly, sensually sucking the plump lip as his teeth latched on, so unlike how he would bite Levi until the man bled.

_Stop it!_

Mikasa moaned as Eren's mouth trailed butterfly kisses down her neck, all the while his large, explorative hands unzipped her beautiful sleek dress and pulled the strap off the one shoulder that was not exposed to him.

Eager hands began to knead her breasts gently, the large hands cupping them expertly as rough fingertips grazed over her pert nipples. Mikasa gasped and arched her back, pushing herself into Eren as he played with her breasts, his tongue leaving a wet trail that seemed to freeze in the chilled night as his teeth gently took hold of the skin at the crook of her neck.

Eren gently began to suck, his tongue lapping at the skin as the pressure in his mouth made its mark. His teeth were gentle as they nipped and held the skin in place. He was surprised by how gentle he was being, how natural it was for him to be this gentle. He'd never done it before, since usually when his teeth found Levi's neck he'd bite to draw blood, always getting the same reaction of being thrown onto his back by the short man and…

_Fuck, Eren! Stop it!_

Scowling furiously, he released the skin, afraid his anger would get the better of him and hurt the tender girl on his lap. Breathing harshly, he pulled back to admire his handiwork, a rough finger gently tracing over the hickey. A mark of possession, Levi once told him. He closed his eyes and swallowed hard, desperate to get the man out of his mind.

He had been doing so well all night. Why now, when he least wanted to think of the short raven, was the man incessantly appearing in his mind?

"I love you, Eren," Mikasa suddenly said in a soft whisper.

Eren kept his eyes closed. Those were the three words he'd longed to hear for so long from another raven's lips, words that never came despite the brunette professing his love over and over again. Now he never wanted to say those three words again. And he didn't. Instead, he simply ducked his head to catch a pert nipple in between his lips.

Mikasa gasped at the hot, wet feeling enveloping her sensitive bud. As Eren's tongue toyed with it, his fingers captured the other and teased it roughly between his expert fingers. His tongue lolled about lazily before flicking the bud as his fingers pinched the other, and Mikasa cried out when Eren's teeth gently nipped at the wet bud.

Eren was enjoying this this. Mikasa's body was so unlike Levi's, and he enjoyed the exquisite treats of the feminine form and what it was doing to him. He could feel himself throbbing in his pants and he wanted nothing more than to be inside the woman that was making him feel like a raging mess of teenage hormones.

"Make love to me, Eren," Mikasa whispered into his ear before giving it a sensual lick.

Eren gritted his teeth at the contact of her tentative tongue on his ear and bucked his hip up at the command. He didn't need to be told twice what to and in the blink of an eye his hands had released Mikasa's body and were both fumbling clumsily on his trousers in a drunken attempt to take them off. Once he freed his aching erection, he took it in his hand and ran his thumb over the precum-coated tip. He hissed at the feel of being touched, but craved more. Desperate to get inside her, Eren didn't even bother with undressing the raven on his lap. He simply slipped her underwear to the side and rested his cock against her wet pussy, sighing heavily at the heavenly feel of her juices touching his skin.

It was so wet, it was foreign to him. With Levi, they always had to use saliva or lube or whatever was at hand to slick up the entrance to make it easier. But now, with Mikasa, it was already wet and waiting, he didn't have to wait for preparation and stretching like he used to with Levi.

_Dammit Eren!_

Mikasa was suddenly nervous. Eren felt big, too big, and suddenly this didn't seem like such a good idea. But hearing Eren's shaky sigh and feeling the shuddering boy as he held himself against her, Mikasa's confidence grew. Eren wanted her. In this moment, nothing else mattered more to him than she did, and that was more than the girl could ever asked for.

"Do it."

He didn't have to hear it twice. The teenager, drunk on liquor and lust, bucked his hips upwards, thrusting himself into Mikasa and burying himself to the hilt in the softest, wettest thing he'd ever felt in his life. He hissed through gritted teeth and grabbed tightly onto Mikasa as the tight warmth sucked him in, burning him up and further igniting the powerful lust that had taken control of all his senses.

The teen was about to start moving when he heard sobbing. He froze and listened to the barely audible whimpers at his ear, confused as he felt warm tears falling onto his bare shoulder.

"Mikasa?" he whispered, placing a gentle hand on her cheek and making the girl look at him.

Her tear-streaked face was breath-taking. Eren swallowed hard and felt his cock twitch inside her as he stared at Mikasa, taking in the image so he could keep it in his mind forever. She was truly beautiful.

"Are you okay?" the boy eventually asked.

Mikasa nodded. "It just hurt," she admitted. "This is my first time.

Eren's breath caught. First time? Just hearing those words made the guilt of hurting Mikasa disappear. His instincts cried victory as it dawned on him that he was the first to be inside Mikasa like this. She was a virgin and he was the one taking that away. It would his to keep forever. This could never be repeated. With a smile, he laid her head gently on his shoulder and started moving inside her. Her moans of pain and pleasure were soft but were right by the brunette's ear, and with closed eyes he reveled in how she felt, how she smelt and how she sounded now that she was his.

"Don't worry," he cooed, kissing her tenderly on her neck "It'll start to feel really good soon."

After speaking those words, Eren froze. He felt sick, his entire body numb. The realization hit him like a ton of bricks as the words he'd just uttered replayed in his mind. Those were the exact same words Levi had whispered to him the first time they had sex, when Eren had lost his virginity.

_Fuck! Eren! Stop! Stop! Stop!_

His hips began to thrust upwards uncontrollably. With his pain exploding full force inside him, he wanted nothing more than to get rid of it. The emptiness was threatening to consume him and Mikasa was his protection, the only thing that could keep the brunette from thinking of Levi, and how it felt when the short raven was inside him.

_God dammit, Eren…_

He growled, grabbing the small of Mikasa's back and steadying himself with his other hand behind him. Unable to look at her, he just listened as her cries of pain turned into cries of pleasure as he powerfully ploughed into her with the sole intention of fucking away his anguish. He wanted to bury himself so deep in Mikasa that the world would completely forget he ever existed.

Mikasa's moaning and calling out his name spurred the drunk teen on. It motivated him to fuck harder, to thrust faster, as Mikasa moaned and cried out and gasped as his rhythm rocked the virgin's body, taking her to new heights as he filled her up with his being.

"Eren!" Mikasa gasped, nails furiously digging into his shoulders in a way that the brunette loved. Hard and violent, just like with Levi.

_Fuck!_

He thrust harder, desperate to forget.

"Eren!" she cried out again, nails clawing as he found her G-spot. Her body shuddered violently as he hit the spot head on, causing the girl to arch her back and throw head back, crying out to the heavens. "Oh, god! Eren! R-right there!"

Music to his ears. That's what it was. His entire body was on fire as thrust into her, drowning in the feeling of his skin being pierced by her long nails as she engulfed his cock willingly with each thrust he gave. Every time he drove in and out of her, the girl would cry out his name, pushing him to go harder and faster, heeding her begging to make her cum, pushing him closer and closer to his release.

A guttural moan escaped the brunette's lips as the familiar feeling began to well up in the pit of his stomach. He bit down on Mikasa's nipple in a desperate attempt to focus and stop himself from spilling right then and there, and as his teeth connected with the bud, the girl threw herself forward and clung onto Eren desperately, her nails clawing inhumanly into his flesh as she began to rock and convulse.

Eren thrust through her orgasm, her first orgasm, as a powerful heat consumed her body in violent convulsions followed by wave after wave of pure ecstasy, her entire being lost in an inferno of tingling pleasure and bliss. She felt that explosive warmth deep inside her that spurred her on, causing the convulsions and bliss to last just a few seconds longer.

His own release was powerful, the convulsing walls around his cock pushing the teen over the edge. Thrusting up as he came in Mikasa, he released his hot seed deep inside her, prolonging her orgasm as his own body shuddered under the weight of pure bliss. The two teens rode out their simultaneous orgasms, completely consumed by one other, the only two people in the world as they came down from their high.

Eren stayed still for an immeasurable amount of time before his flaccid cock came out of Mikasa. But still the girl lay against his him, her breathing rapidly calming down as she held her face in the crook of the boy's neck, too embarrassed to look at him.

"Thank you, Eren," Mikasa whispered against his skin.

Eren only nodded. He had sobered up and the gravity of the situation came crashing down on him. Feeling of guilt and disgust swirled violently inside him as he realised what he'd just done. He'd had sex with Mikasa, taking her virginity, while thinking of his ex-boyfriend. He'd used her in an attempt to numb his own pain. He used his best friend, his sister.

_Oh god…_

Eren's stomach turned as he realized what Mikasa is to him. Best friend. Sister. Adoptive, but still a sister.

_Fuck!_

Eren threw Mikasa off him and dashed off as the disgust reached fever pitch. She called after him but stayed as she heard the boy retching nearby. The girl wondered idly if Eren had regretted what had just happened between them, and dismissed the thought immediately. He was probably only sick because he had had too much to drink.

_What have I done?_ Eren thought, lifting his head. He saw a dark, familiar figure watching him with shaking shoulders. Eren recognized the man instantly, the voice that sobbed silently, but before he could say anything, his head was down and he was retching once again.

* * *

><p><strong>Earlier<strong>

Regret. He had never once in his life tasted the bitterness of it, and now he was eating it for breakfast, lunch and dinner every single day. It had been seven days since he'd broken up with his high school boyfriend, and for seven days the raven was unable to do anything but drink nonstop.

"Why don't you go get him back?" the man beside him asked. He was a tall and muscular blonde with handsome features and blue eyes that cried sincerity.

"Tch," the short man replied, finishing his drink with a gulp. He placed the glass on the coaster and pushed it away, signalling the barman for another. "And then what?"

"You won't be such a mess," the blonde man replied. He sighed. "Look, I know you are a proud person, Levi. Grovelling is the last thing you want to do. But you've made a mistake this time. This decision was the wrong one, but you have the opportunity to rectify that. Don't let that opportunity go to waste, because it may never present itself again."

Levi stared at his blonde friend for an immeasurable amount of time through bored, grey eyes. Though unfocused, the grey orbs held an irritated expression, his thin brows furrowed slightly. But before he could retort, the blonde spoke again.

"Besides, your reason for leaving him is ridiculous."

"My what?" Levi asked, taking his new drink to his lips. "Shut up. You don't know me, Erwin."

"On the contrary, my friend," he said with a warm smile. "I know you too well."

"Tch."

No one knew him. Levi prided himself in keeping his personal life just that: personal. Even his best friends knew only superficial things about him, like where he was from, what he did for a living, what he liked to eat and drink and the fact that he liked cleanliness. Liked would be putting it mildly, though. They didn't know him. Only Levi knew, and that was how it was going to stay.

Until that brunette brat waltzed into his life and flipped over every unturned stone.

Levi frowned in annoyance, taking another sip of his drink. He couldn't comprehend this strange feeling in his chest that compelled him to scratch. His entire body tingled with restlessness whenever he thought of the brat.

"Levi, you can't break up with someone that you've been dating for over a year just because they're going to college."

Levi stared at Erwin as if to say 'you've got to be kidding me'. He thought it was a perfectly reasonable reason to break up. Eren would be going to college and he would get drunk with people he'd never met before, go to frat parties and be chased after by a plethora of young girls and boys with one thing on their mind. Someone would inevitably take advantage of the teenage heartthrob, or – god forbid – he may take advantage of someone.

Levi growled at the thought of Eren, _his Eren_, wanting or being wanted by someone else. The overly-possessive and jealous Levi damn near lost his sanity whenever the mere thought of someone else even looking at his property crossed his mind. He would never survive if Eren went college; with the sex appeal the brunette oozed, it was only a matter of time before something happened.

The solution was simple. Break up.

But since he broke up with Eren, his life was a mess. He couldn't eat or sleep – much less than usual – and all he did was drink. Incomprehensible and unfamiliar feelings welled up inside him, consuming him and pushing his body into a state of ADHD-like restlessness. Sometimes it would actually become so overbearing that he would just throw up, unable to hold down whatever this feeling was that was consuming him.

It hurt his friends to see him like this, but all their pleading went in one ear and out of the other. Erwin wouldn't give up though – seeing his proud and stoic friend in this much agony was breaking his heart.

"Levi, please just go and talk to him. You are torturing yourself for no reason whatsoever, and I'm pretty sure Eren is cut up as well. You don't deserve this and neither does he. He loves you Levi, and you love him. He had no reason to chase after anybody else regardless of whether or not he's in college. You of all people should know how damn loyal that kid is."

Loyal.

Faithful.

Trustworthy.

Aside from words such as hot-headed, loud, and obnoxious, those three were commonly used to describe the brunette. He was a loyal friend, a faithful lover and a trustworthy companion without fail. He had never betrayed anyone he cared about and probably never would. Levi sighed as he remembered the exact thing that made him realize just how faithful Eren is.

_Levi had been out drinking with Erwin and their mutual best friend, Hanji. All three had had a substantial amount to drink and neither one was up for a cab ride, so the trio decided to walk home instead. It was only a three mile walk and with the buzz they had from the alcohol, they would've probably been able to walk ten miles without breaking a sweat._

_Besides, the trio wanted to visit their favorite twenty-four hour café for a post-party treat._

_As they arrived at the café, the trio halted to have a smoke outside before entering. As they stood smoking, Hanji adjusted her glasses and squinted through the large glass windows of the café._

"_Isn't that your boyfriend?" Hanji asked, her voice squeaking with excitement. She placed an arm over Levi's shoulder and bent down to hang on the shorter man. "Man, he's so cute!"_

_Levi looked into the café and saw Eren sitting alone in one of the booths, working on his laptop and sipping on what he presumed would be a coffee. His brows were furrowed in concentration as his fingers furiously cruised across the keyboard, breaking only to take a sip of his coffee every few seconds._

_Levi smiled at this. Yes, Eren was cute, and Eren was his. The teenage heartthrob, desired by many, was his and his alone._

_And then he saw a man walk over to Eren and sit by him. A man all three of them instantly recognized._

"_Uh-oh," Erwin commented in his deep voice._

_The trio watched as 'sex on two legs' sauntered over to Eren, his sex appeal practically dripping to the floor as he took a seat across from the brunette. His dark hair was perfect, silky and styled in bangs that mysteriously covered his seductive eyes. He had a strong jawline, high cheekbones and lips that could make any man or woman's mouth water._

"_That fucker!" Levi growled, and was about to take off to go beat the man up when Erwin grabbed his wrist. "Let me go, fuckface!"_

"_Wait!" Erwin urged. "Let's see what your boyfriend does."_

"_I don't want to see what my fucking boyfriend does," Levi sneered, "He's being chatted up by Sex on Two Legs!"_

"_Are you scared he gives in, little Levi?" Hanji teased._

"_What did you say you fucking four-eyed cunt?" Levi growled, turning back to his friends._

"_Easy, Levi," Erwin cooed, stepping between the raven and the brunette._

_Levi huffed and turned his attention back to the café. Erwin's authority was one Levi never ignored; the blonde had a strange hold over the raven for some reason. He listened when Erwin told him to back off from Hanji._

_Yes, he was actually scared. He knew the man chatting Eren up and he knew that that man had a fierce reputation amongst men and women. He was a sex god and everyone knew it. He knew how to get what he wants and always did. No one was immune to his charms…even Levi had been seduced by him once, and Levi was pretty impossible to seduce.  
><em>

"_I'm sure the kid will be fine," Hanji sang. "He loves you, doesn't he?"_

_Levi gulped as he watched the exchange. The man was shamelessly flirting with Eren, making Eren _laugh_! Levi's skin was itching and his hands were balled into fists as he watched _his_ boyfriend laugh and blush at a complete stranger's jokes. He was starting to feel sick from the heat of the rage that boiled inside him, but Erwin cautioned him again._

_Erwin was right when he'd said that it was best to see how Eren reacted to attention when Levi wasn't around. How Eren reacted to this man would be a sincere reaction from Eren, a reaction the teenage boy would give when he knew for sure no one was watching. Erwin knew that this was what would make or break Levi's trust in the teen._

"_I'm going to kill that fucker."_

_But then something happened that disarmed Levi completely. As the man moved in to take Eren's hand, three things happened simultaneously: Eren's smile immediately turned to a scowl, he jerked his hand away violently, and he abruptly got to his feet. Levi watched curiously as the dark-haired man smoothly tried to reason with Eren, but the brunette would hear nothing of it, throwing his arm out to the side as if he chasing the man away like a bad dog.  
><em>

_He leaned over the table, his oceanic eyes furious and snarled something at the man in the same way he spat at Levi when they were arguing. Levi knew that Eren's voice was low and threatening, and he could see in the teen's body language that he was pissed off. The dark-haired man eventually backed off, hands in the air in surrender, before he hastily left the café. Eren stared daggers into the man's back as he walked off to his car._

"_Idiot," the man muttered as he lit a cigarette. He had anger and defeat plastered into his features. "Doesn't fucking know what he's missing out on."_

_Levi stared wide-eyed at the man as he got into his Porche and speed off. This had to have been the first time he'd ever been rejected, and nevertheless by a high school kid? An intense warmth erupted in Levi then as he looked over to Eren again, who had taken his seat once again, furiously drumming his fingers on the table beside his laptop._

"_See," Erwin said. "He loves you."_

* * *

><p>Levi found himself on a golf course, his pathetic attempt at dressing up in a drunken state came to nothing more than smart pants, sneakers and a dress shirt with no tie. Of course the security to the estate had assumed he was one of the students attending the prom, with his unimpressive 5'3 frame dressed in some resemblance of formal wear, and had let him onto the premises without question.<p>

He'd realized that his plan to crash the prom and win Eren back hadn't been formulated past the part where he crashed the prom. No he was here with absolutely no plan of action and nothing to say, and he highly doubted a 'hey brat, let's get back together' would suffice. Call it a hunch or actual emotional reasoning, but the man knew he had to actually talk to Eren if he wanted the boy back.

Levi was irritated. His best friend had managed to reduce him to him to a grovelling mess, his pride thrown out of the window along with his sobriety. What power did that blonde god hold over him that always made him listen to the man? Levi would never know, but he had to admit Erwin was right: he was in pain.

But what would he say? Levi had never been good with words, and was an absolute calamity when inebriated. He guessed he would just have to be honest…alcohol did that to people, right? Made them honest? Not Levi. All alcohol did was make him drunk and more irritable than his usual self.

He clicked his tongue as he realized the liquor wasn't going to help him in anyway.

Maybe he should confess why he dumped the boy in the first place? No, that would make him seem weak and pathetic. Sure, Eren was well aware of the raven's insanity when it came to possessiveness and jealousy – a _wonderful_ Ackerman trait, he'd said on numerous occasions – but he knew that Eren would never take him back if the brunette knew Levi was willing to _break up_ just because of potential situations that would probably never come to pass.

Levi sighed. But Eren wouldn't stop until he heard the truth. _That stupid brat loves asking questions_, he reminded himself. With another sigh, he accepted that if he wanted Eren back, he would have to be honest with the boy and confess the whole truth. Eren would undoubtedly interrogate him until he gave the boy an answer. It would be best, and easiest, to just say it straight.

_Coming here was a bad idea, _the raven thought, running his fingers through his hair. _Leaving him was a bad idea…_

Just then, a sound caught his attention. It was the sound of a person's voice, low and strained, and it had his undivided attention. This voice was familiar; he had heard it in so many states before, in many forms from euphoric to hung-over, from pained to pleasured. It was unmistakably his voice.

"Eren," he breathed out, relieved.

But his relief was short-lived as the deep voice continued to speak in a low purr.

"Don't worry, it'll start to feel really good soon."

A horrifying sense of déjà vu smacked Levi square in the gut, knocking the wind out of the short raven's lungs. The world began to spin around with a dizzying velocity until he could no longer keep his balance and he found himself on his face on the wet ground. His eyes were wide as the words played again in his mind, gasping as he stared at the earth and remembered when he's said those words to the virgin brunette the first time he had the seventeen-year old naked in his bed.

And then the unmistakable sounds of a man in the throes of passion filled the air; the low grunting and choked moaning of the deep voice he'd become so familiar with over the past year. Levi bit his lip as he listened to the familiar voice make familiar sounds, his stomach churning as his empty, muddy hands before him reminded him that it was not him who was making the brunette cry out in carnal pleasure.

"Eren!" a woman's voice cried out in ecstasy.

The world stopped spinning. That voice was familiar, too familiar. He had heard it before; not once, not twice, but a hundred thousand times.

_I'm gonna be sick,_ Levi thought, lifting himself up a bit.

After emptying his stomach of the copious amount of alcohol he'd stuffed into it throughout the day, Levi moved away from the soiled earth and lay on his back, staring up at the starless night sky. He was unable to move, his body paralyzed from the shock of hearing what he'd heard, and what he kept hearing – his ex-boyfriend having sex with someone else, with a woman.

_Don't let that opportunity go to waste, because it may never present itself again._ Erwin's words came to his mind as he lay and listened to Eren and the woman harmonize as they lost themselves to pleasure, moaning and crying out wildly into the night. Levi closed his eyes and sighed.

He pinched his eyes shut as he heard Eren's low voice drop further as he began to call out something unintelligible. Levi knew that voice – it was the shaky cry Eren gave when he was about to orgasm. For the first time ever, someone else would make Eren cum. Levi's cold heart shattered into a thousand pieces as he hear his ex-lover cry out as he came.

"Mikasa…Mi-Mikasa," Eren cried out, chanting the name like a prayer.

Levi's breath caught. Everything inside him froze; even his heart seemed to stop beating for a long moment. Mikasa? His cousin? Eren's adoptive sister, Mikasa Ackerman? No. it couldn't be. This was simply not possible. Not Mikasa. Not his Eren and Mikasa. He had to see it with his own eyes. He had to confirm what he'd just heard. It was impossible that Eren would sleep with the girl he considered his sister. The teen simply didn't see Mikasa that way, and never has, despite Mikasa's obvious feelings for him. Unless Eren had been lying all this time…

_No_, Levi thought, unsteadily walking to where he'd heard the voices. _That's not possible._

"Thank you, Eren."

Levi felt sick again, but it wasn't alcohol or bile that wanted to force its way up his throat. It was tears that wanted to force their way into his eyes, to spill down his cheeks. And before he knew it, they were running down his cheeks. Uncontrollable streams of tears came from his eyes, cascading down his pale cheeks as he stumbled forward, blinded by the tears flooding his eyes.

That was definitely Mikasa's voice. It was familiar, because he'd heard it so many times. He'd heard it laughing, talking, shouting, screaming…but he'd never heard it moaning out in pleasure. That was why he couldn't place it earlier. But that mere thank you, the way Eren's name rolled off her tongue…there was no mistaking it.

A sudden shuffling against the earth caught Levi's attention, and he froze, crying silently to himself as he looked up at the figure that was doubled over before him. He could hear the gagging and coughing that came from the figure, and it made the short raven sick. He fought back his sickness as he recognized the untidy mop of brunette hair of the figure before him.

_Eren?_ Levi thought, but he couldn't get himself to move.

As if he'd heard the raven, Eren looked up, his eyes sparkling unnaturally dimly. He frown slightly in what looked like recognition, but before he could open his mouth to speak, his head dropped and he vomited some more.

Levi stepped back, watching Eren for just a moment longer before turning and hastily walking away. This is why he never opened up to anyone! Forming unnecessary relationships with people led to nothing but drama and politics, and ultimately heartache. Humans were untrustworthy scum and in the worst of situations, even the best of them turned out to be pigs.

But no. he had to get involved with a high school boy. Despite the illegality of it of all, he'd known it was a bad idea to get involved with gorgeous brunette brat from the start, but his dick did the thinking for him and he'd gotten the boy in his bed once. And again. And again. Until it wasn't his dick thinking for him but rather his heart. That damn brat had him addicted, and now, like any other drug, had left him absolutely ruined.

The worst part of it: he could blame nobody but himself.


End file.
